It’s always OK to Pause. With Blanca Velazquez-Martin

It's always OK to Pause with Blanca Velazquez-Martin

What exactly is science telling us about the benefits of adopting a gentle and respectful way of parenting? Today my guest answers some of these important questions and reminds us it is always ok to pause before dealing with our child’s behavior.

What We Talked About

  • Our willingness to grow when becoming parents
  • Why did Blanca choose to be a Montessori parent?
  • Understanding the positive evolution of respectful parenting
  • Dan Siegel’s model The Brain in the Palm of the Hand
  • Why timeouts don’t work and what actually happens to your child when sent in timeout
  • The important role co-regulation plays with your children
  • Learning to stay calm when you’re about to lose it benefits both you and your child

Things to Remember

“Parenting is an everlasting willingness for growth and humility within our relationship with the young people in our lives.”

“Gentle and respectful parenting is not about just being permissive. It’s about having respect for the child’s phase of emotional and socioemotional development.”

“No child can learn if they are feeling threatened if they are feeling unsafe.”

“The brain doesn’t learn from a place of shame, children don’t learn from a place of fear.”

“Pausing is okay. It is okay to not do something immediately.”

“The adult is the most important tool in the room.”

“A tantrum is not an emergency.”

– Blanca Velazquez-Martin

“Kids do well if they can.” – Dr. Ross Greene

Additional Resources

The Whole-Brain Child: 12 Revolutionary Strategies to Nurture Your Child’s Developing Mind, by Daniel J. J. Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson

Dan Siegel’s model The Brain in the Palm of the Hand

Let’s Continue the conversation…

Now, Blanca and I want to know from you!

Do you ever wonder if how you are disciplining helps your child’s social-emotional growth?  Listen in to find ways you can positively impact your child’s EQ.

Leave a comment below and let us know, you’ll also be helping others to know what is possible.

Remember The Art of Parenting was created for you, if you have any suggestions for experts I should have on the show or parenting questions you want to be answered please let me know here.

More About My Guest

Blanca is a child psychotherapist and parent devoted to building caregivers to build respectful, positive relationships with young children. 

She empowers parents with strategies to support healthy emotional development based on scientific evidence, positive discipline, and the Montessori method.

Show Sponsor

This episode of The Art of Parenting is sponsored by The Parenting School supporting you to raise curious resilient children while minimizing the overwhelm. Click here to get on the waitlist today.


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